•May 28, 2017 • Leave a Comment

I wonder, in these moments, whether the ache of missing you is really an echo of connection. Is your heart calling mine?  Is it letting my heart call yours, if I allow that feeling to linger?


•May 4, 2017 • Leave a Comment

It creeps in, unexpected, in the middle of a sleepless night. Soundless, until the Darkness has pounced, slicing straight into my heart and turning, twisting the knife…

No one chooses you, it whispers its poison in my ear as it withdraws, hoping its attack will have undone me. No one. Never

And two tears fall, into the ache of my heart. Only two, all I will yield to my flesh. Then I breathe deep and reach for the  Truth.

Because I know it’s a lie, and a sin. The pain I believe is in my heart is only wounded pride, desiring exaltation for myself, and by some man, though no mere man can fulfill what only God can. It’s untrue: a man chose me once, and we were so toxic together that I know beyond knowing that being chosen, in itself, is not enough. It’s false twice over: God Himself  has chosen me for His own… loves me perfectly (for He is perfect)… sent the perfect man, His son Jesus, to save me… and He promises never to let me go.

I breathe that Truth, and look to the Light, and drawing the poison out, He heals me.  And so again the darkness fails. As it always must.


•April 26, 2017 • Leave a Comment

It may be the first time, may be the only time, that I am going somewhere else without having, however accidentally, followed him there.

This time, I am leading.
Going ahead of him.
Going without him.

In the audience

•March 18, 2015 • Leave a Comment

It’s a small venue – a conference session or a corporate meeting, the audience close enough for him to engage with them a bit as he speaks. From my seat on the sidelines, separate from the main tables, I watch him deliver in his smart, engaging, funny way.  Continue reading ‘In the audience’

Just one time

•January 28, 2015 • Leave a Comment

Just in passing, I read something about self-care.

That you can’t give what you don’t have.

That you have to put your own oxygen mask on first.

And this makes me think of you.

That’s a common enough occurrence; thinking of you comes naturally. Today it’s this topic, but it could be any number of other things that bring you to mind at any time. Or nothing at all; you’re just there in my thoughts.

Continue reading ‘Just one time’


•November 9, 2014 • 1 Comment

I don’t feel it, but I am, technically, hanging off the lower half of the planet. If not for gravity I, and the ship I am in, would fall off the world. Would, perhaps, be hurled off into space by the spinning of the earth under us.  Continue reading ‘Adrift’

A large and looming nothing

•June 23, 2014 • Leave a Comment

I haven’t seen him in forever, and I’m surprised to find he’s the guest lecturer at a session I’m attending.

It’s wonderful to see him, and afterward, we make plans to get together for dinner… Continue reading ‘A large and looming nothing’